The word “holiness” is one of those terms that, depending on your background, can carry a lot of baggage. For some of us, it’s connected to feelings of guilt and shame, an impossible standard hanging over us. Others associate it with harshness and judgment after hearing it taught legalistically.
At first blush, 1 Thessalonians 4 might seem to play into these stereotypes by linking holiness with sexual morality. Paul exhorts the Thessalonians toward holiness by cautioning them from indulging in “lustful passions,” and instead encouraging each person to “control [their] own body” (vv.4–5). Just another Christian prude, our present-day culture might think. However, there is more going on here than first meets the eye.
First is the Thessalonian culture, which is remarkably similar to our own. Many New Testament scholars note that the pagan Thessalonian culture had a liberal view of sexuality. Sex outside the bounds of marriage was not only permissible, but even encouraged.
The second thing to note about this passage is the tone. It’s tempting to read instructions about holiness in a thundering voice of condemnation, but that was not Paul’s approach. In verse 1, the Greek word erotao—translated “entreat” or “encourage”—has a connotation of gentleness and friendship. Paul isn’t dropping a hammer of judgment; instead, he is clarifying and affirming a community he loves.
Paul can see the Thessalonians are living out their faith well. They are honoring Christ with their lifestyles. They are pursuing holiness in every area of their lives. But as they continue to do so, Paul wants them to make a distinction between the teachings of their culture and the teachings of Christ, which diverge on the issue of sexual practice. This context matters, especially in light of popular stereotypes about Christian holiness and sex. For Paul, holiness is not a measuring stick we should use to compare and condemn. By its reckoning, we all fall short.
Still, “God has not called us to impurity but to live in holiness” (1Thessalonians 4:7)—for our own sake and for His glory. Holiness is our witness. It’s how we point the world to the character of God and proclaim, “This is what God’s love is like.” God’s love is intimate and invested. It is constant and covenantal. It is dignifying rather than degrading. It does not use and abuse. It does not take advantage for a short-lived thrill. It is not rooted in selfish desire but in self-giving faithfulness. Our holy lives bear witness to all these things.
In that sense, holiness is not simply about being different or set apart, but reinvigorating the imagination of a world that misunderstands both God and sex. Rather than sneer at our culture and its sexual norms, we can humbly and joyfully point to something better. Our holy lives can serve as the embodiment of God’s best for humanity, a vision of freedom, honor, and dignity.
Holiness was never meant to be a spiritual bludgeon, and it is much more than a set of boundaries and rules. It is our witness to a world that has forgotten how to live. It is our witness to a world that has forgotten what we are for. And it is our witness to a world that has forgotten what God is like. Everything about us—our bodies, our sex—is a part of that witness. We, the people of God, exist to point people to God. Love is His song, and holiness is the dance.
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71 thoughts on "Living to Please God"
It is our witness to a world that has forgotten how to live. Powerful statement. A reminder of what we are called on this earth to do. Point others to Jesus.
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this post was so helpful in understanding the passage more and an encouragement I needed this morning – thank you!!
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“[Holiness] is our witness to a world that has forgotten how to live…”
Dang. That’s good. It’s interesting thinking back on my single life and how deeply I struggled with the concept of purity. I would definitely blame a piece of it on not being in the word and seeing what God wants. It’s so good. He really knows what He’s talking about.
I don’t usually read the devos, but was led to today, and let me just say that reading was great! All the Amens!
I am so grateful for the blood of Jesus that covers ALL sin.
Psalms 103:4… He redeems my life from the pit and crowns me with love and compassion.
Really needed this!!! Having trouble with my teenage daughter so hopefully this can get through to her
Amen. It is so damaging. And I feel the same. And as someone else put here sometimes we search for things that we think will fill the holes in us. But, it never does. Only God can do that.
Thank you ADB ❤️ Praying for your family too.
@Jen Brewer – I am in the exact same place as you, dear Sister. Know that I am praying for reconciliation and healing to take place in your family as much as I am for my own. ❤️
Amen and Amen Tina! I so love that part of this devotion that says ‘ love is the song and holiness is the dance’ . You are loved my sister!
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Jen praying for your family. We have brokenness in our family also. I know how hard it is.
I love the devotion today & where it says “for Paul, holiness isn’t a measuring stick we should use to compare & condemn….” I think so many Christians can get dangerously self-righteous—sadly there was a time I was like that. But God, thankfully, continues to work on me!
I’m continually challenged to live in holiness. ❤️
Holiness is what i long for holiness is what i need!
Thankful that the mistakes and misunderstandings about who I am or was of my past, do not define who I am today.
As I youngster, wanting to belong was so important to me, I think, though we know much as children, we do not know alot. My journey was one of replacing what I had lost in my mother leaving me with my daddy. And though I had a loving home, wrapped in goodness, friendship, protection, gentleness, I still felt abandoned and searched for ‘love’ I guess, and in the wrong things, ways or people.
But God..
Dear wonderful, faithful, loving God..
He rescued me from my searchjng, He gave me a ‘forever’ feeling of belonging, not to an earthly family but to Him, in my understanding of His Son, and the gift of life IN, not life away from Him.
I search mo more, and now, with the respect I have for who I am in Jesus, my body, my heart, my being that I so easily gave away, for the want and search for the ‘missing’ love of my mother, knows peace..
I am still looking for Mr right… But God..
It is our witness to a world that has forgotten how to live, It is our witness to a world that has forgotten what we are for. And it is our witness to a world that has forgotten what God is like. Everything about us—our bodies, our sex—is a part of that witness. We, the people of God, exist to point people to God. Love is His song, and holiness is the dance.
I was never witnessed to in how to live ( my body being a temple), I never forgot, because I never knew ‘what we are for’, and it is only in my walk with God, that I now understand, what God is like, and who He is.
Hope-filled that as ‘a people of God’, I hear His song of love, daily, so my dancing in holiness will be a witnessing and point people to God..
Amen..
Blessings..❤
Wow, what a wonderful devotion. Beautifully worded and thoughtful.
Today’s devotional is so rich with insights and inspiration. I never looked at holiness as being a witness to God’s love, and learning that is definitely a lightbulb moment for me! “Love is the song, and holiness is the dance” ❤️❤️❤️. I was prompted to ask myself what holiness means to me, and these are the thoughts I’ve written in my journal: (1) To make every thought captive to God’s will, (2) To dedicate my mind, soul, spirit and BODY to God, (3) To always act with my purpose and calling in mind, and to constantly ask myself “Does this serve my purpose, which is to glorify God?”, (4) To be directed by the Holy Spirit in all I do, (4) To behave with dignity and grace, as a princess and the precious daughter of the one true King.
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I really appreciate the way you view this passage. Growing up in the church, this was a heavy emphasis on “saving yourself” and never really talking about it again. It’s important to remember it’s not only physical, but emotional and intangible. Sexual immorality is damaging, and has damaged me more than I care to admit, but intimacy is what we are designed to crave – wether that be physically or otherwise!
Wow, LeAnn, you are wise or have quoted something wise (regarding His song and the dance!)
I loved this devotional today. Such an amazing perspective on holiness. As Christians, we are called to show the world who God is through our actions, words and lifestyle choices. I pray that the way I live my life, those around me would see that God’s way is so much better than the world’s way. Let us not be known for what we are against, but what we are for.
Requesting prayers again for reconciliation and healing in my family. Open hearts and minds to hear the truth and take captive every thought and replace lies with truth. I feel like our family is tearing apart and the other side isn’t even willing to meet to discuss and correct misunderstandings and share hurts despite my husband’s and I desire as well as my parents for things to be made right and relationship restored. Aching and frustrated and grieving and angry and tired and sick all at once. Thanks for listening.
Amen Mercy. Thank you for sharing.❤️
“Rather than sneer at our culture and it’s sexual norms, we can humbly and joyfully point to something better.” I love this! It’s so different than the way we, as the church, normally handle things. I appreciate this perspective♥️
We have victory in Christ!
Amen to Kyrstin’s comment that says, “Sex and intimacy is not equal”. I was very much confused about these two concepts at my younger age and it was a loop cycle for me. Truly people can very much perish for lack of knowledge, especially the young people without proper understanding or mentorship. I was one of those young perishing people. And God was the first to show me what intimacy looked like, He saw how broken and needy I was, He came to fill all the empty voids, He truly restored my soul like He said in Psalm 23.
Sexual immorality is extremely damaging, emotionally and psychologically. But the plan He has for us is a plan of hope and a future. God showed me what true intimacy was, and only true love and true intimacy can outlast all challenges (lust is short-lived, façade-based, conditional and therefore demeaning). But God, our God, the One and only, He forgave, He bandaged me up, and He erased the memories of my past, He corrected my thinking and understanding. That was in the spirit realm, and in the physical realm, He brought my husband, to again show me what intimacy was. That was my story of the battle, how I experienced His mercy and goodness on the other side, and to GOD I give all the glory.
Dear Sisters (who are struggling), I encourage you to ask God to heal your memories, and erase permanently those hurtful flashbacks, and ask Him to help you take on a new IDENTITY. Do it now. See yourself as pure and clean. That is truly you, being already cleansed, pure and white as snow (Isaiah 1:18). Please boldly ask God in prayers to take off your mind all the haunting memories of filthiness, unworthiness, guilt and condemnation, and HE WILL, as He did for me. He will do it for your. You have been made new in Christ, brand new (2 Corinthians 5:17). Our minds often play catch up with this concept, but we are truly new. Believe that with all your heart.
God is truly holy, merciful and kind. The world misunderstands God (yes to Sharon Miller), they misunderstand and pervert the purpose of his design for intimacy, they don’t know God. We, children of God, need to get our understanding right first, of who God is and who we are in Him. In all your getting, get understanding (Proverbs 4:7), then we can point to the right direction, show the correct way of living, and give Him the glory in the process. Amen.
So good. So so good. Our holiness is our image of investment like God is invested in us. ❤️
Reading Gentle and Lowly by Dane Ortlund now! What a fresh perspective on Jesus! ♥️
Completely agree Dorothy! I never thought of holiness this way!
I love the way she explains this. For so long growing up in the church I felt I had to be GOOD and earn God’s love. But that is so far from the truth
Wow! So much shame in the comments today. Even though we know God has forgiven and forgotten our sins the enemy is right there, trying to plant seeds of doubt, asking, “are you sure? Those were big sins, you know….”
BUT GOD has given us the resources for victory in the Holy Spirit. We are responsible to use —not reject (v9) — those resources to overcome all sin. The Holy Spirit empowers us to fend off guilt and shame freeing — and encouraging us — to abound more and more in a walk that pleases God. Amen!
Jenn your words ring so true to me. I had my first son out of wedlock and at a young age. He is one of my greatest blessings but also a constant reminder of my sins. Any new people we meet all give me that same look of “man how old were you when you had him” I struggle with shame still to this day. I am now married with two more beautiful children. God has blessed me with a beautiful family despite my sin. I know God has forgiven me but I still need to work on forgiving myself. I will be praying for you and I today that we can leave our shame at the door and step into the new life Jesus won for us on the cross ❤️
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Yes and amen
What helpful insight in this passage! I too lived a very different lifestyle when I was younger. More than being ashamed, I’m heartbroken that I shared sex with more than one person. That I didn’t trust God to give me the strength to be celibate outside of marriage. I hurt myself so much with the behavior that I once had. It is probably the most crushing sin for me. It tears me up. Even though I know that I’m forgiven it is hard to let it go. I know my life could have gone so differently if I had God in my life from a young age. But thankfully God intervened and put people in my path to point me in a different direction. I’m SO thankful for that!
Holiness is Christ in me. Thank you SRT, for the way you spoke into this subject. I have always loved Daniel and Joseph’s stories and the way they were faithful to the Lord. When others look at me they don’t see me in that way, I just hope they see the grace by which I am saved and that I pour it out towards them in the way that Jesus has towards me. He removed our transgressions Sisters, it is by His blood we find forgiveness and freedom. So thankful for the Way, Jesus and His redemption. For we have all sinned, every one. So have the grace you have with others with yourselves, and know His grace is over you. Hugs and love to you all. Thank you for sharing today, so blessed me.
Wow! Sharon’s last two sentences just blew me out of the world. I want to sing the song and dance the dance of God. I want to live the life of holiness.
Lord God, help me to live a life of holiness, to follow Your ways, to walk in path. Help me to teach Your word. But mainly help me to live life befitting a Christian. Amen
Sisters have a blessed and wonderful day.
Amen!
Jenn, I too lived a much different life before I came to Christ as an adult. I found my self worth in what men desired about me. I often wonder how anyone can take me seriously as a Christian who knew me back then. But after reading Kerry’s reply and with tears streaming down my face I know as far as the east is from the west He has removed our transgressions from us. Resting in this today. Praying the Lord helps us forgive ourselves and let’s others see a testimony of what God can do to transform lives ❤️
I don’t usually comment but I would like to recommend the book Gentle and Lowly by Dane Ortland to anyone struggling with shame and guilt. Jesus died, rose and sits at the right hand of God ready and willing to help us with anything we are dealing with and it actually gives him great joy to do so. I have the audiobook version and hearing the author read the book in his gentle voice has been such a blessing to me. Hope it might be a blessing to someone here too.
Highly recommend the book Outdated by Pastor Jonathan Pokluda, he speaks on sex, dating, relationships, and marriage all based on biblical principles and it was so helpful! :)
Praise God that there is forgiveness. There is true satisfaction and joy only in Him. Help us tell the world of how good you are Lord.
Jen, I can relate to this. I am married and still some times struggle with this. With in the last year, I have been really specific with my prayers on this topic. I don’t think I have ever just asked God to give me the sex life as He has designed it. I know I have been forgiven from the moment I accepted Jesus but now I feel I have been healed from my past. Praise God he works in every aspect of our lives. Give it to Him and He will change you! ❤️
I bet the people Paul was writing to really stood out in their over sexualized culture. I think it will be more and more that way for believers in America. I am encouraged that there is nothing new under the sun and that if God gave them the strength to walk holy, He will give it to me too. Praise the Lord!
One of the many things I am grateful for in SRT reading plans, devotionals, and public commentary is a better understanding of the context in which a Bible passage is written. I had not known before that Thessalonia was a place of rampant sexual immorality; thus Paul’s entreaty to them makes more sense. The fact that Paul himself was younger than Jesus is new to me as well, I had always pictured him as a church elder. Many thanks for the SRT team and reading community for continuing to educate me and help me draw closer to.God.
Hello sisters,
I have been morning with a sister in Christ over what we call “chronic singleness” . This passage speaks to the fullness of love and community that makes life so rich even without a spouse and partner. We have been reading and gushing over Paul’s love and affection for the church in Thessalonica and it reminds me that this is where true intimacy lies in the church.
So I encourage those who are single like me, either wishing they had a spouse or otherwise, to lean into that bond of the body of Christ, and I encourage those of you who have families to include single people in your lives and love the church like it is an extension of your family—because it is!
Loved what y’all said on the podcast this week. You have your spouse but you also have your SigUh’s (significant others)
I definitely connected with the idea that Holiness has been used to cause a lot of shame and hurt in my life. I group up in a very legalistic context, but I was comforted by the first in the reading from Ezekiel. God places a new heart in us and will CAUSE us to diligently follow his precepts. Wow! Thank you God, we our purified by the Gospel and he does the work to cause us to be obedient. Lean in to that spirit today, smile and enjoy him and he will make you “wholeheartedly from this time forward to cheerfully and willingly serve him!”
Love y’all
I echo Jeannie’s sentiments in that this devotion caused me to reflect if I’m bearing witness to God by the way I live, by how I interact with my friends, by how I interact with my patients, etc. I love the quote someone shared in the comments “Without my past, I wouldn’t have my testimony today.” Even though I don’t full feel I’ve completely overcome my struggles with sex as I still need to walk in complete dependence on God and obedience on a daily, even hourly basis, I KNOW God is working to redeem those areas in my life. Even as I walk through this journey I can boldly declare that God is not finished with me yet.
The moment I finally gained the understanding that I’m not called to live with certain behaviors for the sake of checking off a box, but rather because THAT is how God treats and loves me (in grace, dignity, purity…) and that living that out then presents God’s gracious and pure love to those who (sorry to disagree on this one tiny thing with the author here..) hasn’t FORGOTTEN what that is, but rather has never even EXPERIENCED it in the first place, was life changing. I didn’t feel weighed down by “following rules”, but rather empowered to demonstrate His precious and life-giving love to a world He wants so desperately to reach. It’s not a burden, it’s an honor.
Jenn, I’ve been serving the Lord over 30 years now. Trust me when I say life prior to that was very much like Sodom and Gemorrah. So much shame and hurt-one day I was praying AGAIN about all that I had done-not believing I could truly be forgiven by God, when I heard His still small voice say-I had forgotten all you had done, why do you keep reminding me? I realized then in God’s eyes it was truly gone-now I had to forgive myself. So hard but so worth it. Here I am 30 years later-sometimes depending on the day I weep at the loss I’ve experienced-but I know I’m forgiven. May you walk in that too. It’s on the ocean floor! Oh and all that loss? God has redeemed that too! ❤️
“Love is His song. Holiness is the dance.” Beautiful imagery. That one will stick with me.
Holiness is our witness. Holiness is linked to wholeness. Being restored from our sexual sin, we are a witness not just of God’s forgiveness, but of His restoration in Christ.
Holiness is not a measuring stick we should use to compare or condemn. By its reckoning we all fall short.
Thank you Father for giving me a new heart and putting a new spirit within me. Lifting up all of my sisters today who may struggle with looking in the rear view too often. I know redemption and I can speak to the holy power of your restoration.
@Jenn I agree! I always am thinking in the back of the mind that I am being punished for the sexual sins I have made in the past. Even after accepting Christ, things didn’t change in an instant or overnight, so that sexual sin still continued for a bit until I did take control of my body with the help of Christ. But today’s reading helps me to have peace in knowing that yes God forgives and he knew the true intentions of my heart and how hard it is to fight the temptation. And because he saw my heart he helped me get to where I am today of getting rid of that temptation. So I do have hope that one day I will be able to love and have that intimacy with someone, but in His timing.
“Love is his song, and holiness is his dance.”
That’s a great sentence. Amen. It’s hard to bear witness to how sex and holiness has been watered down in the world, especially the Christian world. It’s no wonder the rest of the world doesn’t understand the importance.
Today’s passage will push me to pray about being gentle. I’ve taken a vow of celibacy. It’s been seven years. In December it’ll be 8 years. I didn’t think I would be able to do this honestly. God knew I would. I think I’ve mentioned this before, but it’s really my best friend’s encouragement that gave me the strength to commit to this decision. I’m not writing this to make anyone feel or see anything outside of encouragement.
I used to walk in the societal pressures of having sex and being in a relationship. My soul needed to be single this long. There’s so much I’ve walked through, and so much that was buried inside now exposed in God’s light. I’m so thankful. There were strongholds that only the blood of Jesus broke free. God knows the desires of my heart better than I do.
I am learning that God’s timeline isn’t mine, because God’s ways are higher then mine. (Isaiah 55:10.) What makes sense to God, rarely makes sense to me. His voice and path is something I will always walk in, regardless of what plays out. I can take heart, because Jesus overcame the world.
Thank you for posting this entry. ❤️
Holiness is not haughtiness…we are called to shine a light and to long for those in darkness to come to the light of Jesus. It’s easy sometimes to fall into a self righteous trap in pursuit of holiness (guilty over here!) but that is not living a holy life! Jesus never acted out of self righteousness, but out of love and longing for the lost to be found. May my testimony be one of holiness marked by love, not haughtiness marked by self righteousness! I’m so thankful for Jesus!
I enjoyed this insight on holiness today. “We exist to point people to God.” Of course, I know that but as I just read that it struck me in a different way. That’s a very convicting statement, especially when I think about it in a personal sense- “I exist to point people to God”. Do I? I see this as a reminder to be careful and to also be intentional. Whether I realize it or not, others are watching- my children, my students, my community, people that I encounter daily- I need to live in a way that points to Christ. I’m convicted that I have not always lived a life that honored God. However, I thank God daily and praise Him for His grace and the changes that He has brought about in me. I pray that I can use my past circumstances to help others facing similar situations. Zac Williams said in something about him that I read that “without my past I wouldn’t have my testimony today”. What a great reminder- regardless of the past, God has redeemed and restored and we can be used for His glory.
Jenn- I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. I’ve been reading a lot about some of the “purity culture” things I was taught, and taught my older children. I’ve realized that unfortunately a lot of that teaching has led to precious children of God feeling the way you do. Please, look at the book “Talking Back to Purity Culture” by Welcher and the Bare Marriage Podcast by Sheila Gregoire. There is freedom. There is forgiveness. Sex and intimacy are not equal, and you will have 100% intimacy with your future husband. Biblical purity is not about sex. It’s about our hearts. It’s been twisted. I’ve had to apologize to my adult and teen children. I’m working to redeem it. Praying for you!
Such a good reading!!!
Churchmouse, thank you for sharing the NSAB version. I also really love how you asked “what if we truly viewed our bodies as designed for sanctification and honor (as God intended)?” …it really encouraged me!!
Thank you to all you sisters who prayed for me yesterday… I felt your prayers ❤️
As in, Alicia’s comment about this simple encouragement.
That got me too. Such a good reminder.
I am very thankful for this insight today. This is very personal to me in so many ways. I have three unmarried adult children, and only one is truly striving to honor God through sexual purity. The other two are using the world’s standards as their own, and it breaks my heart. They think I am a “prude” and “judgmental” but I have been telling them this very thing. As Christians we must strive to be different from the World in order to be a witness AND because it is ultimately for our good too. Sadly a mother’s words often fall on deaf ears, but I pray that the Holy Spirit will continue to pursue their hearts and that their hearts will be softened and open to God’s truth.
So well written and such wonderful insight into the holiness we are called to! “Love is His song, holiness is the dance.” Holiness is our freedom in Christ to be lived out of reverence, love, and gratitude for our Saviour to show others the way.
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In the NASB vs 4, 5a Paul states that God desires for the Thessalonians/believers to “know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in lustful passion…” Instead of viewing our sexual urges as barely controllable, what if we truly viewed our bodies as designed for sanctification and honor (as God intended)? It matters not what everyone else seems to be doing, we Christians are to base our sexual activity on what sanctifies and honors. Why? Because we know God. We know how and why He designed us. Living within His design is living my truest self. He has given us the Holy Spirit to help us remember this high and holy calling and to empower us to walk in this Truth.
Amen ❤️
I never comment on these readings, but thank you today for this simple encouragement.
“Rather than sneer at our culture and its sexual norms, we can humbly and joyfully point to something better. Our holy lives can serve as the embodiment of God’s best for humanity, a vision of freedom, honor, and dignity.”
We, the people of God, exist to point people to God.”
God warns us of evil. He gives us a new heart and the Spirit to guide us. He paid the price for our redemption on Calvary. His sacrifice rids my heart of the stain of sin and purifies me. My King does not need anything I have to offer. And yet, He cherishes a life laid down, obedience in the little and big, His love poured out on me and through me, in the power of the Holy Spirit. This is my witness. It is my offering. For Jesus Christ, my King. My Your name be praised. Amen.
As someone who struggles with the sexual sin from my past, I have been seeing and hearing this a lot lately. After I read today’s devotion I opened up my Bible and the verse that I read was Hebrews 13:4. I know that we serve a forgiving God, but I struggle with whether or not I will ever be able to experience true intimacy with someone again someday after all that I have done. Instead of feeling condemned for the sins of my past, I see todays reading as a reminder of how to live, be forgiven of my past and press on to not make those same mistakes in my future. God is good. God forgives and I know that I am not defined by the mistakes I have made. Lord thank you for your mercy and your grace.
If they have a love like anything, that’s ok to think to me, but I hoped to be not all people is not to be and I don’t want to think people who doubt. Everyone have a love, like I have, to be God and to be Holy I believed, and I wonder it is not hurt things to be all person.
God’s word tells us to be holy as He is holy.
It is our witness to point people to God. It’s this. I must live in a way that points people to God….to always try to live holy, as my God is holy.
And living holy isn’t necessarily living in the way that culture says is the way to live…