Text: Nehemiah 4:15-23, Proverbs 11:14, Hebrews 10:24-25
Nehemiah may not strike you as a story that deals with relationships, but at the core of this book is a powerful message about God’s children working together to accomplish a holy purpose. In this case, it was rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem, all while preparing for a possible attack on the city.
Nehemiah has a gift for asking for help and being specific in his needs. While it was his initial desire to rebuild Jerusalem, we see him gather up the Israelites to become active participants in this, to do whatever job they could do.
It might have been very easy for Nehemiah to take all this on and then whine about a lack of volunteers. Instead, he asked directly for what he needed. He didn’t worry about being a bother, he let God take care of their hearts while he went ahead with his mission.
When we ask for help and work with others for the Lord’s calling, we open doors that might have been impossible to open alone. God rarely has a solo plan for His work, and our lives intertwine with other Christians so that we all can draw from each other’s strengths.
Our Christian friendships allow us to use each other’s God given gifts to work together for His greater plan.
As women, we often struggle with turning to another in a time of need. We’re told not to be annoying, to go with the flow, to stick it out. Being able to turn to another woman who loves the Lord changes so much in our lives. Whether it’s a commitment to pray for us as mothers or daughters, to encourage us on a job hunt, to stand by us during a hard time in our relationships, to help with something tangible – we need each other.
“Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.” (Proverbs 11:14, ESV)
Today, think about Godly women in your life who may be blessed if you turn to them with a need. Bind together in your friendships for Christ and see what marvels take place for His glory.
“…and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more, as you see the day drawing near.” (Hebrews 10:24-25, NASB)
My word for 2014 is 'dependence.' As a perfectionist and control freak it's so hard for me to ask for help and even more so to accept the help. My goal is to be ok with depending on God and others when I need it. I can't do it all on my own and rather than get overwhelmed, I need to let go, ask for help, and accept it. Fits in very well with our study today.
I also have longed for a "best friend" for a very long time. Whenever someone new entered my life and I felt a connection with them, I'd think "Maybe this is the answer to my prayers, maybe we will become best friends." When I first met my husband, I felt that God was telling me that he was this "best friend" I had been longing and praying for. I love that he is such a great friend and confidant, but there are times I still long for a best girlfriend who I can be close with.
Wow. I am sitting here in tears. This really spoke directly to my heart and to the longing I have for a close connection and community of strong Christian fellowship. Nehemiah asked directly for what he needed from God. Now I will do the same.
I like that…I have found out on several occasions that God wants us to be specific in our prayers and requests so that way when he answers them we know exactly where they came from and he receives the glory!
This Nehemiah study has been really what I need in my life right now. About a year ago I wanted to leave my marriage. I was ready to walk out the door and be with someone else-anyone else. I started going to counseling by myself. I remember a question my counselor asked me. "Who is Lisa and what does she believe about herself and God? How can she stay true to herself & her beliefs? Seeking God's truth I feel I am not released from my marriage. There is still a void I feel in my heart- a level of intimacy I don't have with my husband-that I crave. We are working on it though. I am trying to be patient *(not a strength for me). I have had lots of opposition. Many people have told me to do what would make me happy. That I have tried long enough-re-enforcing my own feelings/doubts about positive change. I struggle every day to be obedient to God but Oh how I feel Him right there beside me. I need to continue to do this kingdom work. Generations after me will be affected by my choices. I do know that God can heal us. I am weak though- it would be so much easier to just start over. Amazingly a year later….God has blessed me with a Godly friend I have known since we've been 12 yrs old. We had drifted apart from each other because of life but she has been a constant cheerleader for keeping here in my marriage. She has led me back to truth, showed me the positive changes in my husband even when I didn't want to see them, she has encouraged me and she came alongside me and attended a bible study with me (I was too afraid to go alone)- she reminds me of my dreams and tells me all the time God is going to do great things for you! He has a plan- wait & watch and see. I know this is no accident. God has seen my struggle and has sent me help. Building walls/foundations for God's kingdom both in my heart and for future generations. I keep walking and trusting in faith my Wonderful God, Greatness & Power & Glory & Majesty -Everything in heaven & earth is His- even my adoring heart. ****Maybe I have shared too much but I feel that I am not alone in this struggle and maybe someone who is struggling the same way may benefit from me sharing.
You haven't shared too much, Lisa! Thank you for sharing so honestly. I am not in the same situation, but it's beautiful how God provided someone to come alongside you and to not give up… I will be praying for your marriage as well. Be blessed, friend.
Valarie, I have been there. After college, all my closest girlfriends moved away. Between working full-time and spending every moment I’m not working caring for my special needs daughter and trying to be the best wife, I have had a miserable time with female friendships. It has been my prayer for years. A “bestie” who shares my values and love of Christ and family. My mom has even prayed for me to find a true friend. It’s taken 13 years, but I finally find myself involved with a small group of ladies that are the friends I’ve prayed for. One in particular has become so close–and she’d been praying for a friend, too. It was certainly not the timing I would have chose–I want what I want NOW!–but God is faithful. I believe He will answer your prayer in His time. Just keep praying it!
Close friendships are hard. They take time and intentionality, which I don’t feel like I have a lot of sometimes. I have to be willing to walk past my comfort zone in order to have better friendships.
I agree close friendships are hard but if God is kept in the center of it they are not impossible to keep. I prayed to the Lord about a year and a half ago to send me friends that desire to have and do have a relationship with him because I have worldly biological sisters who are not committed to him at this time and that effects us getting close because they participate in things that I do not. So I felt because I am unable to have a close relationship with my biological sisters at this time that I wanted to have a relationship with girls who would be my "sisters in Christ". So around last year sometime he answered my prayer. But its funny, prior to me actually building my relationship with my sisters in Christ, the Lord revealed to me through his word the characteristics that I would need to have in order to stick in our friendship. He took me and reminded me of the fruits of the spirit…patience, longsuffering, kindness etc. which are things I had a sincere desire to meditate on (which I didn't realize at the time was preparation for me to have a relationship with the girls I prayed for). With that said, I am currently in a position with my "sisters in Christ" in which the Lord has given me an opportunity to apply the concepts of the fruits of the spirit to our friendships especially the patience and longsuffering parts. We have had disagreements and our all getting familiar with each other personalities (which at times rubs me the wrong the way) but at the end of the day we are all works in progress, no one is perfect except for the one who has brought us together and I am so glad that the Lord gave me that insight, because I would have walked away from our friendship a long time ago. So I say to you, if you desire to have friendships pray to the Lord about that and the desire to stay committed to them despite obstacles that may come your way, because they will come. But have encouragement that if you keep the Lord first and stay tuned into his word he can and will get you through any obstacle.
The Lord knows my needs…. This today is so timely for me as I have a friend (the rock we all turn to, the prayer warrior that is our go to) who is facing stage 1 breast cancer. It is especially hard for us because we lost one of our group to this hideous disease 5 years ago. This reminds me that accomplishing the Lord's work with others may not be traditional work but helping others, volunteering, just being there for someone. I would have never thought to look in Nehemiah for this pearl of wisdom and direction.
What solid truth! Thanks for reminding us that "god rarely has a solo plan". As I get older (27 here!) and life changes through marriage and children, I Have found that community and true friendships are harder to come by. I loved this reminder and commission for authentic relationships and to take the risk to lean on one another.
Today’s devotional really hit home for me. I grew up as an only child so I learned to do everything by myself. I never really enjoyed being a part of groups and never really had a lot of friends. As a matter of fact, I made 1 or 2 friends in every stage of my life and I’m still friends with them now. Today, I still don’t much like being a part of groups and often still feel like I’m still alone if I am. I pretty much consider myself to be a non-group person. Over the years it has evolved to where I really don’t like asking for help and if I do ask for help, I want the least amount of help possible. I also don’t do well with delegating, unless it’s things I really don’t like to do. Reading today reminds me that there’s so much more that can be done if we work together and work as a team. It reminded me to try and find team opportunities and use them and learn from them.
Hi, Lesley! Vulnerability is a tough thing and we feel honored that you would share with us. I think you'll find a supportive and encouraging group of women here to pray with and for you. Asking now that God would open doors and send fellow believers to walk alongside you.
XO-Kaitlin for She Reads Truth