Text: Matthew 5:4, Isaiah 61:1-3, Romans 7:21-25, 2 Corinthians 7:8-10
Fifteen years ago, during a bleak February chill, I awoke early and jumped in the shower, ready to head back to the hospital. I’d been without our firstborn son—still less than a week old—for almost eight hours. And it was killing me.
The phone rang, and I heard Gabe answer. I knew it was the doctor calling with the lab results. Sixty seconds crawled by before Gabe cracked open the bathroom door. Seeing the look on his face, I collapsed.
There will never be words to describe the pain I felt at that moment. I had no idea I was capable of such grief, yet there I was, wailing. I could not shed the anguish fast enough.
Gabe and I drove to the hospital in silence. I realized I didn’t know a single person with Down syndrome. I was ashamed I’d overlooked this community, a sorority of mothers whose children had Down syndrome—a sorority to which I now belonged.
Some people have been taught that the Christian life makes no room for sadness, gives no permission to mourn, allows no time for lament. This kind of mental toughness might seem a practical approach for immediate survival, but unexpressed grief can become a bitterness that chokes us. When we dull our pain, we dull our joy. When we numb our lows, we numb our highs.
Jesus has a different perspective on grief. He never lacked emotion or expression. He “was a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief” (Isaiah 53:3). And in His impassioned Sermon on the Mount, He gives us this promise: “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted” (Matthew 5:4).
When we grieve—not if—we will be comforted.
Not long after His sermon, Jesus experienced this for Himself. “He took Peter and Zebedee’s two sons, James and John, and He became anguished and distressed. He told them, ‘My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me’” (Matthew 26:37).
Jesus wept from empathy, from disappointment, from pain. He mourned, and when He was finished mourning, He surrendered to the work of God—work that brought great freedom to all of us.
Since that fateful February morning, I’ve grieved with friends who have walked through fear and loss. Loss of love and marriage vows. Loss of sanity and peace. Loss of life, in the womb and out. And I’ve watched those same folks experience the death of their own will, and by His grace, receive Jesus’ comfort instead.
None of us wants to encounter such deep grief in our lifetimes. But the more we mourn our sin and need, pain and loss, the more we can trust and anticipate the gracious comfort Christ Jesus promises to bring.
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112 thoughts on "Blessed Are Those Who Mourn"
Thank you lord for always being there when we need comfort
HI She’s!
Late in the day, but wanted to say thank you for the prayers! My pain has decreased today! (And pain group was really uplifting! So many good testimonies of how God IS there with us in the pain!) Which is relevant for today’s message. God will always use our pain to reveal his perfect love for us. He is good, and He is Just!
We must realize our sin, that we are outside of His will, and that then should grieve us. That He instantly cast away our sins when we come to Him in repentance should make us weep with great joy. Have you ever been forgiven when you know the person has every right to turn their back on you? It is so gutwrenchingly (new word) overwhelming! He is full of grace and we don’t deserve it. It saddens me how “Christians” (me) put other things on pedestals and importance (idols) and not reverence for an Almighty Creator. He is my joy, my strength, my song, my redeemer, my Lord of lords and King of kings! He is my Creator! Would I walk to the end of the earth sharing His name?! (Hm…sometimes I can’t even confess His glory to my family…!)
Praying today for all my She sisters, and especially those with requests.
I think that Jesus was talking about both kinds of grief: the grief that comes when we experience such a deep loss that comfort can only come from God; and the grief that comes from a broken heart when we realize our sins against God. I have experienced great human tragedy in my life, and like many of you, absolutely know that I could not have survived without the comfort that can only come from God. And I have suffered the grief that comes from realizing the depth of my sin, and truly grieving over the disconnect that came because of unconfessed grief. In one great tragedy, I clung to God, knowing and feeling Him walk with me and carry me through grief like I had never experienced. Then when another great tragedy in my life occurred, instead of clinging to God, I held onto anger and bitterness, and walked away from my faith for many years. Anger and bitterness are a really heavy weight when I don’t let God come along side to carry the burden (Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart…Matt. 11:28-30). That kind of grief is truly unbearable, and because I wasn’t casting that heavy burden on Him, I was not finding rest for my soul. Instead, I was turning further away from the only One who could mend my broken heart. After a number of years living like that, I finally came to my senses (just like the Prodigal in the pig pen) and returned to my Father. My heart was broken over the sins I had committed. It was through suffering the grief that comes from realizing that I have broken my Father’s heart, yet He still loves me and is waiting for me to cast my burdens and my broken heart on Him that I found peace. God did wondrous things in my life after I laid the grief from a broken and repentant heart at the foot of the cross. I am so grateful that Jesus will comfort us after the death of a loved one AND the grief that comes from a heart that is broken due to sin.
Grief feels like physical pain. I’ve felt it. My stomach was always clenched. My body was feeling the loss that was coming. My heart hurt after Tanner died. BUT GOD…was there every step of the way.
I also felt grief when I came to Jesus. That was way back in my 30’s. I would be in the fetal position on the floor wailing in grief for how I had been living. BUT GOD..once again was there.
“Tragedies become stepping stones to the heart of God and His comfort.” -Dorothy Kelly Patterson
Kristine, thank you for sharing that beautiful illustration of the oak trees and the reminder that everything is a season.
Mari V- thank you for taking time to pray for all of us today
Good morning, sweet, sweet She’s. Just like Searching’s comment this morning, I too, and I’m sure most of us, if not all of us, when we have experienced deep pain, we actually feel “physical“ pain. I am thankful for Matthew 5:4, the promise that those of us who mourn will be comforted. We can believe this promise that when we experience pain, we WILL BE comforted. Many years ago, when I thought my heart was going come out of me, and actually felt physical pain “to the touch“ my God, my Jesus healed my broken heart. Now, whenever I experience pain, I just know that I know, that Jesus is with me and I will get through it because Jesus promises to be strong for me and I believe the promise of Matthew 5:4. Taking time this morning to pray for all of you.
Matthew Henry:
Deep humility before God, hatred of all sin, with faith in Christ, a new heart and a new life, make repentance unto salvation. May the Lord bestow it on every one of us.
Got questions:
This sermon was a collection of truths designed to prepare His followers for His kingdom, which involved a lifestyle radically different from the world’s. …
Those who learn to mourn over their own sin find the heart of God. And intimate fellowship with God is the very foundation of true happiness.
Watching the sermon on or near the site where Jesus preached the Sermon on the Mount gave me a wholly different view of this passage. It’s all about who, what, where we are in our faith walk with Jesus. Yes, He does comfort us when we experience earthly mourning- I am ever thankful for that!- but, as we have come to realize, it’s all about eternity and where we are in our walk. It’s so easy to lean towards the temporal and we need to lean more towards eternity, trusting our Sovereign God. Easier said than done and preaching to myself here!
SEARCHING – So cool that you shared sermon notes from a few years ago! Thank you for the great comment! ❤
LYNNE FROM ALABAMA – Continued prayers for you and all involved in the progression of Jack’s care – knowing that you are experiencing a type of earthly mourning that few will ever understand. I include LINDA IN NC and NANCY S in my prayers (though they are not here with us).
So thankful for God’s comfort in our times of mourning. Then we can comfort others with the comfort God has given us.
Yes, the Lord comforts me when I mourn. When my heart is so broken that I physically feel the pain, He is with me, always with me. I am so thankful I can trust Him to walk with me at all times and especially when the pain is unimaginable.
Gathered from several sources – got questions, enduring word, sermon series our pastor did several years ago:
Jesus is directing attention to the mourning we feel when we realize we have done something terrible (sinned) rather than what we feel when something painful has happened to us. When our hearts are broken over our own sin… when we confess those sins to God, repent of them and cling to God’s guidance, wisdom and strength to walk away from those sins, rather than refusing to even acknowledge that what we are doing is sinful.
I saw so much truth in a comment by COLLEEN (11/16/16, 12:25 pm): “what doesn’t come so easily is honesty in repentance” and “I’d rather hide than face God with the truth of my sin.”
Additional scriptures that tie in:
Psalm 32:5
I acknowledged my sin to You,
And my iniquity I have not hidden.
I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,”
And You forgave the iniquity of my sin. Selah NKJV
1 John 1:8-10
8 If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 10 If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us. NKJV
We learned (or were reminded of) yesterday that we need to recognize that on our own we are poor in spirit, worthless from a spiritual perspective and desperately need God, and today that we are to mourn our behavior, grieve over our sins and receive the comfort of repentance. A light bulb came on when I looked at the 2 verses together – that without studying ahead, I think I’ll end up seeing that the whole point of these beatitudes will be a roadmap of salvation and walking with the Lord. So needed.
SHARON JERSEY GIRL – praying for Jonathan, and a return to Christ, that he will think back to his childhood and remember. Praying for your continued knee recovery.
LYNNE FROM AL – praying for encouragement and wisdom in your caregiving. ❤️
RHONDA J – praying for relief of pain and harmony at home. I try to remember to think about whatever the issue is – will I even remember it next month? Will the outcome of the conversation have any long term importance or consequences? If my answer is no, I try to take a deep breath and let it go. If it’s one of those “yes it really does matter” things, I try to lay it down at the time and pray for guidance to work it out later. Note that I said “try” …
CEE GEE – great comment yesterday ❤️
Kristine, thank you for your lovely description of an oak. A few years ago I attended an event to honor several “oaks of righteousness” that served the Christian community in our state. Each table had a piece of an old oak tree. In mourning our hearts can feel empty but the Lord has just made room for more joy to enter in. Lifting you all up today.
Those who mourn will be called “oaks of righteousness”. I think about oak trees, how they sink their roots deep into the earth, sturdy and strong. But I also think about how they change to weather all the seasons. Sometimes they are bare and shivering, waiting for the new life of spring. Mourning is like their winter season when all looks bleak. Spring is coming but it may not feel like it.
Thankful that I know Jesus to be my Comforter (that’s how I am blessed as I grieve).
RHONDA – praying your pressing in to Jesus and serving others changed the outcome of your day
It’s real. He is real.
My cousin and best friend died in a tragic accident when I was five years old. She was four at the time. Since then I’ve lost my great grandparents, both of my grandfathers, an uncle, and another cousin. I don’t believe that a five year old can understand what death is, never mind process the loss of a loved one. I’m sharing my story because reading this has made me realize that I have been mourning for almost twenty years now and I probably always will be. But I have to trust God and rest in the peace that only He can give me. I know now that I am not alone.
Love this.
“Unexpressed grief becomes bitterness that chokes us.” What powerful words. I have always been the “grin and bare it” type— it has forever been easier for me to stifle emotion than to deal with the vulnerability of truly feeling. I have felt the bitterness, hardness, and anger that has festered inside due to this repression. Lord, give me the strength to be honest and open— to share my emotions and true feelings and allow You the opportunity to bring great comfort.
This is very comforting to hear. I feel grief very emotionally and physically and sometimes wonder seem if I am handling the hard times in my life as I should.
Loved this and was perfect to share with a friend that just lost her 3 year old daughter :(
I also believe that conviction from the Holy Spirit when we sin brings Godly sorrow and therefore repentance. We are blessed when we feel sorrow from our sin because God convicts us.
This what I took from this as well Brittany. 2 Corinthians spoke to me about Godly grief. Not worldly grief. True repentance. Just saying, “Lord, forgive me for my sins today.” Or, “Lord, forgive me for for being unkind.” Or Heavens, “thank You for dying on the cross for my sins” without true, gut-wrenching mourning about how wretched a sinner I really am! Truly getting to the heart of what Jesus did and mourning my ugliness. And being in awe of His Glory. I needed this today. Thank You Jesus. Search me. Turn my heart to true repentance. Amen.
I think the biggest takeaway for me is that Jesus was well-aquainted with grief. We are not alone when we mourn.
Beautiful study, God bless you!
I am not mourning, but I love that I am still comforted.
Thank you for sharing
This really opened my eyes to see that it’s ok to feel emotions. Most importantly, it’s ok to feel depressed somedays. That I need to fall on him in those times.
I love reading what everyone has received from the Spirit after each devotional. I enjoy reading new views that offer different insights and really “dig into” the meat and potatoes of the word. What I got out of today’s devo is that it’s okay to feel emotions. Especially during the lows. I’ve tried for years to fight back the not-so-pleasant emotions because I felt like they weren’t godly (and seeking help was a lack of faith in God). Boy was I wrong! Over the past six months or so, I’ve learned what a. Lessing it is to still love, trust, and praise God during those rough patches. I’ve learned that by doing that I am able to bring Him even more glory. Amen! I welcome those emotions now and pray that the Spirit use them to mold me into the women God wants me to be.
What stood out in this Be Attitude was the phase…… The Death of our wills after 25YRS and 6 Churchs the 7th Church, Informed me, my will had to DIE.
Thank you for this reminder of surrender. So many times I think I’m okay handling things on my own and saving my sorrow or frustrations away from God, but he has so gently been reminding me to come to him with all my stuff. I love how this devotional talks about mourning leading to surrender. It’s okay to be sad, to miss someone, to wonder why they’re gone, but then to walk into the arms of the father and have piece that our loved one is okay.
I often feel that grieving and mourning does not pay respect to the multitude of blessings God has bestowed upon us. This devotional is a comfort to know that even Jesus mourned and that we can let ourselves rest in that mourning before resolving to surrender to God’s will.
In the words of Laura Story from the song “Blessings”-“What if our greatest disappointments, or the aching of this life, are a revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy. What if trials of this life are His mercies in disguise.” I’ve learned this in the past 3 years. It’s a very, very hard lesson, but the mercy and grace that follows passes all understanding.
H
Write your thoughts…I feel like I’ ve been doing things on my own not relying in God I just need God to help me to put faith in him to trust Him to experience the death of my own will and by his grace receive Jesus comfort instead.
Gods timing is totally perfect I needed this reminder today. So many times I want to enter grief or pain of a friend or a family member and give them answers. But this is a great reminder especially today that Jesus brings comfort to those not me and my calling is to mourn with them and praying that the gracious comfort of Jesus enters the situation and their heart. Thank you for your honesty
I am mourning the loss of my marriage vows by my husband’s choice. And while still mourning, I am experiencing the promise of the Lord’s comfort. I was also feeling a little guilty that I could still have joy in the midst of a divorce. In the midst of tears for what will never be. But the Lord is good all the time. And he has good in store for me.
Praying for you Joy. I went through the same situation. Yet in all of that, the Lord has taught me that He is sufficient. Time heals, and the Lord will fulfill His promise and carry you through.
Sending you lots of love and prayers, Joy.
Thank you for opening up about your story. I could only imagine what you felt during that time, but praise be to God your little blessing is still among the land of the living. I love the reference here that we mourn our will and trust in God’s will. Be blessed sisters.
This message comes to me on the 1 month anniversary of my Ex losing his life in a motorcycle accident. His girlfriend, due in March, and his mother, of whom was her only son could carry more grief than anyone I personally know. I was struck in ways unexpected, but I was called to comfort them and release my past within my own wrestling mind. We found comfort in friendships made possible trough him as well as coming together to raise money for the family. At this time I think of his child that will grow up with out him, my mother who was adopted (national adoption day is soon), and a story of a 1 year passed miscarriage and ponder the mysteries of our precious births and passings… we mourn our losses, but there is always new life on earth, regenerating, and eternal life in heaven. It seems like a far off comfort, but in this unpredictable life it is our security. Jer 29:11 is used to give quick comfort to those who are struggling, but it is meant to strengthen our faith in those hard times, not see to it that we are gaurenteed a happy ending or cheap thrill. I am told, to my understanding, that this promise was given to the Israelites to their agony, and that they would not see its fruition for many years. That they instead must endure something that they were not expecting to. To stay I the very place they expected to be delivered from. As always… There is hope in Jesus Christ.
Wow. God is good even in the toughest of times. I will keep you and everyone involved in my prayers. Continue the legacy that he lived so his child will always know how great of a father he has waiting to meet him in heaven (:
A friend introduced this site to me only moments ago, and to see this message…I am speechless. My father and older brother are set to deploy soon and I have not been handling it well if at all. This message gives me strength to not fear the deep sadness I am feeling. I will make sure to share this message with my family!
MG, I will be praying for you as you journey through this change. Also lifting up your Father and brother as they are away from family and serving. Thank them for their service.
I am in a state of grief right now, as my marriage is not where God wants it. I feel like roommates at best and have been praying over this situation for over 10 years. It seems the enemy is ever upon us as bitterness, anger, bad attitudes are worse than ever before. The mountain is almost too high to climb anymore. I have almost lost my will to fight and he sees nothing wrong. God is faithful and I know in His time, the mountain will be cast into the sea and healing will begin and restoration will take place. I know my God is big enough to see me through this grieving season.
Oh sweet woman. I don’t have words of advice, but please know I am praying for you.
As my grandma used to say “keep on keeping on.” God rewards our patience sister. Praying for you and your marriage.
I’m going through something similar, Susan. A friend once told me you can’t outsource God’s love. I’m trying to put my focus on my relationship with God and the deep joy and peace that comes with that. If I can manage to feel love, peace, and joy in this time, I would have achieved heaven on earth. Praying for you, Susan. If you see this, please do the same for me.
Rebekah, thank you for such a raw and vulnerable devotion. I felt the Holy Spirit speak to me deeply. Your story let’s that happen for so many people, I’m sure! I’m so thankful Jesus cares about your true emotions. Otherwise it would be such a surface level relationship.
Thank you for sharing. Thankful that he comforts us as we mourn. Loss is so hard and my family knows about it all too well. The only reason we have gotten through is because of the comfort of the Lord.
http://www.in-due-time.com
A beautiful and very relevant quote from the Broken Way by Anna Voskamp. “He never treats those who hurt on the inside as less than those who hurt on the outside.”
Thanks for sharing, Jess. Grateful for you!
xoxo-Kaitlin
This devotion is so comforting and freeing. I have a bit of a melancholy temperament. Sad is an emotion I know very well and happy emotions I feel rarely (except in His word funny enough :)! ). I feel broken and sorrow not just for my own personal griefs, but for those around me. The brokenness of the world- injustice, abortion, racism, abused children, sickness, backsliding sinners, family or church divides… I just feel it all deeply. I have learnt to let those feelings be my fuel to pray. I think godly sorry and mourning is a good and needed thing for those called to intercede for the world! Matthew Henry also mentioned that the Bible records Jesus weeping or grieving many times, but never laughing! (although I’m sure he did) The point is those who belong to another kingdom have this strong feeling inside them that everything here is NOT OKAY. There’s a place to take those tears and find release. Praise God
Thank You, thank You, thank You, Jesus, for this encouragement. Thank You Lord for the words for how I am, for how I experience life. Thank You for the opportunity to see my regular tears as a gift, as pointing toward You, instead of the burden they have felt like for so long,with a husband who cannot process my near constant flow of tears. Give us Your guidance Lord… To learn more about one another and not be afraid.
Thank you. I am in a period of morning right now.
Praying for you to be comforted with the comfort that can only come from our Lord.
Praying for you, Tina.
Praying for you Tina. Thank you for allowing us to lift you up.
I have experienced the deep comfort of God in the middle of heart-ache. I’m so thankful for His closeness in those hard times. But what doesn’t come so easily to me is honesty in repentance. I’m like Adam and Eve…I’d rather hide than face God with the truth of my sin. Being repentant is, at first, UNcomfortable. Getting real is hard. Father God, please help me, especially in those most frustrating moments, to face the discomfort of looking honestly at my sin so I can rest in the comfort of Your forgiveness. Please give me a softness that keeps me close to You and then give me the grace to comfort others….
Praying with you for these things Colleen. We can all draw closer to Him in honesty and repentance.
I have had a battle of temptation. It is so hard. I don’t want to keep going back to it. This past year I finally broke down the barrier that was between me and God. If you could, please pray for me that I keep that barrier down and flee from this temptation everyday. I need God so much. He brings JOY. He brings PEACE. He brings LIFE. Life to the fullest. Help me remember your love that gives life Lord.
Definitely praying for you. I know temptation well. Keep leaning on Him, because He is so much stronger. He takes the desire to do wrong away from us if we ask Him. We don’t tap into His power nearly enough. His grace doesn’t run out, and He gives it without judgment.
Praying, Sarah. Be strong, sister. The reward is so worth it.
Thank you Rebekah for sharing so honestly with us! May you be blessed as you parent your wonderful child…may he bring you JOY tody in unexpected ways. Blessings to you today for such a thoughtful and encouraging message.
I have been away from this community for a little while- really for the last 10 days since my husband and I found out we were expecting our first child. I’ve been so tired in the mornings that I haven’t made the time for the consistent devotional time I was having. I know I need to get back into it.
This morning, when I opened up to see the title of this day’s study, I very nearly closed the browser window and went to read something else. I experienced a miscarriage with my first pregnancy, and since then, I do struggle with the fear that the life God granted to my womb could suddenly be lost. I didn’t really want to read about mourning, because I was afraid it would bring up all of my fears. Instead, as I surrendered to the “coincidental” choice of passages this morning, I saw God remind me how He comforted me in that very deep loss. I remembered too how precious He made the life of my little one who came after that lost baby and how I never take her joyful life for granted, because I witnessed first hand how fragile life is. I have great thankfulness to the Lord for His gift of eternal life, as the ones I have lost, my little unborn baby and others in my life, are united with Him in eternal joy.
First line should be-“Expecting our second child”. That was a preggo-brain mistake, for sure!
So glad you are here! I will add you to my prayer list. This community has been such a game changer for me in my walk with the Lord. May He pour out His blessings on you, your husband, and your unborn child.
I understand your fears, I hope that you and your baby stay safe and that you can rest in God.
We lost a baby this year as well at 9 weeks. Praying for you today. ❤️
This is my first She Reads Truth series ironically found due to my recent loss of my father and the grief/anxiety I have experienced since that time. I think I struggle as much with the idea that as a Christian I “should” be stronger, braver, wiser, and have more faith/trust, etc. Also, that God is disappointed in me for still being sad and struggling with the anxiety 3 months later. Your entry, Blessed Are Those Who Mourn, has certainly been used to touch my heart today. And in addition, which also brought tears to my eyes again, your story of the grief you felt 15 years ago on the February morning is mine exactly but 12 years ago in February! Same news, wonderful journey with our beautiful daughter who next to Christ has taught me more than anyone.
Thank you, Rebekah.
Lisa
I think your anxiety and mourning is normal. I think it’s good to lean on God instead of what we think a Christian woman ought to be. God will comfort you and lead you.
Lisa, thank you so much for joining us today and sharing your thoughts. Praying that Christ’s peace rules your mind today, friend.
xoxo-Kaitlin
There is a bravery which develops out of experience in grief, through mourning in public and private, in turning to others, and in telling them about the pain of one’s loss. The character of compassion is revealed by those to whom we go for support. For some, this comes easily, while for others not so much. Different cultures and societies teach how to embrace or hide feelings of sorrow and pain. Some teach that mourning is a sign of weakness, whereas others teach it is a sign of strength. Likewise the compassion we encounter reveals various forms of acceptance or rejection.
Rebekah, Churchmouse, Linnea and Wendy – your thoughts have me nodding my head. Whether we realize it or not, through our grief, it seems wherever we turn, and whenever we need to turn, we ultimately find the comfort we need only after we fully surrender into God’s care.
Thank you for saying that it’s acceptable to be overwhelmed with grief. So often our grief is diminished by well meaning friends by telling us that it’s God’s will and we should have more faith. As Christians we know that Hid is in control but that doesn’t negate our sadness and pain.
Thank You!!!!!!!
Jesus was a Man of Sorrows. Deep within Him there was the JOY set before Him that He willingly went to the cross. As I mourn my sin and the effects of sin in this world I, too, desire that same JOY to spur me on to live out my life faithful to the One who died to give me life. Thank you,SRT, for reminding us to Whom we belong!
2 Corinthians 7:8-10 is so good. I try to remember this when I am being challenged by a close friend. When I am being corrected in love. So many times we get offended and defensive but we should rejoice that their correction makes us upset, because we know that if we are feeling this, then we know we are in need of that correction. I love verse 10, “For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death.” <3
http://www.littlelightonahill.com
“And I’ve watched those same folks experience the death of their own will, and by His grace, receive Jesus’ comfort instead. None of us wants to encounter such deep grief in our lifetimes. But the more we mourn our sin and need, pain and loss, the more we can trust and anticipate the gracious comfort Christ Jesus promises to bring.” These words touched my heart this morning. I needed this. I am so glad to serve a risen Saviour who is able to sympathize with us when we grieve and comforts us.
I was talking to a high school girl yesterday about sadness. She was sharing with me how she’s been feeling sad lately and how uncomfortable it makes her feel. We talked, prayed, and I encouraged her to reach out to our school counselor, but when she left I was thinking about her uncomfortableness with sadness. I think our western culture puts so much emphasis on happiness -finding it and doing it things that bring it – that it causes people to think that they’re somehow broken (in a negative way) if they experience it. I’m not discounting depression at all as it is something I’ve been working through for years, but it is still curious to me why being sad is considered wrong or weak. I have found in my own life that there is much to learn in the quiet silence of sadness. I liken it to being in the woods when it is snowing. The quiet in that circumstance is almost surreal. There is no sound, only the peaceful beauty of the wintered trees. Today I take comfort in the notion that God meets me in those moments, pulls me tightly to him, and allows me to simply rest against him. Thank you, father.
Robin H… Your comments immediately brought to my mind the Pixar movie ‘Inside Out’ and how the little girl, Riley, was grieving over a family move that took her away from everything familiar (friends, favorite pizza etc). Her emotion Joy kept telling her to be happy all the time…but ultimately it was her emotion Sadness who saved the day by giving her permission to be reminisce and mourn (“Crying helps me slow down and obsess over the weight of life’s problems). Pretty grown up stuff for a ‘kid movie’. Sorry for the secular reference …but I think there is something to that. It makes me want to track down ‘Inside Out’ on Netflix and watch it again.
So beautifully, stated, Robin! I was talking with my students about this idea yesterday, telling them that they should not feel shame for feeling sadness, grief, depression, etc. I pointed them to this verse, and it struck me: when we are humble and vulnerable enough to share our pain, we invite God into our struggle–and He often then surrounds us with people who tangibly act as His hands and feet as they comfort us and help us bear our burdens. If we refuse to show our grief, we isolate ourselves. I find it so gracious that the Lord would use our mourning to not only draw us to Himself, but also to unite us with others.
Have you ever had loss or grief so sudden or deep that it takes your breath away? I have watched others and seen where, because of relationships in place through a connection to Christ, others have been used to help focus on The Comforter. Sometimes you have no words to pray – no song comes to mind – no blessing can be remembered and then a fellow believer reads a verse, sings you a song, reminds you of God’s faithfulness in their life and His promises for you too! Someone who has walked ahead of you in your particular path of grief, and experienced God’s comfort, is uniquely qualified to help you find your own way. I think this is why God calls us to fellowship – real connection.
All the yeses! My dad passed away this year and when I could not pray all the prayers I needed, countless people’s prayers were answered and I felt comfort like I never had before in the midst of the deepest pain I’d ever experienced. Never before have these scriptures felt so real. way more explanation of God’s sweet goodness and comfort here https://keptnear.wordpress.com/2016/09/28/the-words-ive-found/
Grief can be a beast. Never knowing when it will rear its ugly head. My mom died 11 months ago, my dad 8 years ago. (And I’m only 44). I miss my mom deeply and God is the one to provide the comfort I need. Friends can offer hugs and an ear, but those who have not walked through what I have can’t understand. I’m thankful for Him, the constant in my life.
Praying for you, Melisa. I’m certain the holidays are extra hard without your parents, especially your mom. I ask that God would show you the joy of who they were throughout this holiday season. I pray that as you remember, that God would be your comforter. Blessed are you, sweet woman. ❤️
God in times of pain, please guard our hearts, guard our words, and guard our steps. We want to serve you in the best way we know how. It is for your Kingdom we can only move on, and that we come to new places in our lives. Help us keep our eyes on you, and help us to help others along the way. As we look for answers, help us to look for you and see YOU in all the hard transitions that come our way. Amen
AMEN!
Amen! Thank you, Wendy.
I know I’ve mentioned it before but my middle daughter has a bear that she has loved since birth. He is well worn and shabby but he is her go to in all things. She has found herself in dire moods and each time, “Red” is tucked tightly in her arms calming her in a way I never can. He is her constant consulation, confidence and comfort. As wonderful as “Red” is, he is no Christ but I am prayerful that as she grows, she is able to see Christ more because of having had Red in her life. We all need comfort, we all need a love so sweet and amazingly we have this. Our constant is Christ. There is no better friend, Father, or comfort. I have mourned many things and losses in my life and with each struggle Christ has been my peace. My circumstances don’t change; the heartache, the hurt, they are there in my grief but with Christ there is peace and comfort in His promises over me. So thankful, beyond words thankful, for a love so generous!
A love so generous….love your analogy this morning, as always ♥
I am so thankful that this verse makes it ok to grieve and mourn. So many times, I feel like I need to stay strong and not show weakness. I need to keep my feelings inside and keep moving forward for my family. But reading this today, lets me know that I can stop and take the time to feel grief. I can mourn for those lost and seek my comfort in Him.
I agree…..and I wish I had heard these words long ago……I was never “given permission” to grieve my mom’s passing….and that taught me to chin up and power thru all of the other losses in life…..which definitely led to a dulling and numbing. Thankful that the past few years have shown me that it is ok to grieve, that it is not weak, and not being unfaithful to God….I’m learning – slowly -with God’s help to allow myself to fully feel emotions – no matter how painful it might be <3 I know He is with me, loving me thru it all.
So often we are mourning a broken and desperate world… mourning our sin, our loss, our disappointments. I have come to realize that there is not an answer or a “fix” necessarily – no matter how hard I try to create one. Sometimes this world is just broken. But thank God that we have a firm, unshakeable Hope in Jesus Christ. He has promised a future inheritance that is beautiful and perfect. He will make all things right… that is why we can rejoice. That is how we will be comforted. ❤️
Amen!
I am the same way Linnea. My first thought is who can I call, who can I talk to? And God says me, how about me? He has comforted me through loss of my parents, a year where all my adult children had major problems at the same time, and anything else that life throws my way. I am being continually reminded that He sees the big picture! And He has used my hurts to understand and bless others just as you said.
I have mourned death and loss of various kinds over the years. Some I have spoken about. Others I have not. Joys I share quickly. Sorrow, grief … Not so much. It takes time to process, to work through, to go the deeper still. I do that best by myself, in my prayer closet with the One Who knows me best and loves me the most. Perhaps it’s because I have found that some look at the wounding with the curiosity of a gawker passing an accident. They are more interested in the gory details than in comforting the broken-hearted. So I go to my Comforter first and I linger long with Him. He and I work it out. It takes time. I selectively share my sorrows with others . I choose my words carefully. I have found it wise, and yes protective, to do so. I want my testimony to be the presence of the Lord in it all, not the how’s and the why’s. I do not know if it is because I am an introvert but I need that private time to meet with God and surrender to the work He is doing through the grief. Then and only then can I, will I, share out of it. How about you?
I have learned or am learning this – to go first to The Comforter instead of seeking comfort in others. I am not an introvert and my first reaction is always to “call a friend” but God has shown me He is the only One who can take my sorrows and turn them into His beauty. Seeking to do this elsewhere leads to more confusion and angst. I do think God uses people in our lives to bring comfort and love but when people are my first line of defense things do not work out so well. I also am so amazed at how God can use the hurts we go thru to ultimately bless others when we are ready to share from His perspective!
Thank you for sharing that, Linnea!
Churchmouse and Linnea, I could not agree with you both more! It has definitely been a learning process for me. I recently went through such extreme heartache. I so wish I would’ve truly and deeply gone to my Father first and foremost. Through my healing, I’ve learned to only seek Him first through times such as this. I’m patiently waiting to see what the purpose in this is for me. I am praying that this experience will lead me to help others and that I can fully heal from it. ❤️
There’s such comfort to go first to The Comforter…the One whom we don’t have to explain, don’t have to use words, but can totally rest and just breathe in His Presence. I wonder, knowing this, why do we as women find it hard to silently comfort others? Why do we feel like we need wisdom or words to share with the hurting? Maybe what the hurting need most from us is total silent love…arms open wide without explanation…allowing His Love to be shown through us.
I can so relate. You always have a way of eloquently putting in words exactly what I feel. People, even the closest of friends, just can’t understand what we each are going through unless they have personally experienced the same trials. But God knows fully, cares deeply, and provides inexplicable peace during the darkest times. Lamentations 3:21-26 and Psalm 3:3 have been my go to reminders from Him.
I am learning the profound importance of speaking less and praying more! I naturally look to others for sympathy and then get frustrated when they don’t understand me or care as much as I thought they ought! Taking it to Him first is powerful and so wise. Thanks for this very important reminder <3
When my 18-month old grandson was diagnosed with nephrotic syndrome about a year ago, a form of kidney disease, he was so sick. I remember just crying out to the Lord. And actually ever since then I often the Lord’s presence more than before. My grandson still has nephrotic syndrome, but he is doing quite well. Thank you Lord.
I love how honest she is with her writing. When was there a time where you guys mourned and experienced the Lords presence comforting you?
Hi Annusa, this was so good. We lost our fifth child, Gabriella in the womb at 36 weeks. I never, ever have sensed His presence like I did during the time of her death. He as sooooo there for us. I felt as if He carried us through the grief. Thankful to this day for His love for us. :) then joy came when we were able to have another baby, Abigail. How about you?
Jeannette,
When my husband and I miscarried our first baby last year, I used the exact same words that you did. I felt like God was carrying me through my days in that time. That’s how I would explain The Lord’s presence. Now, a year later, we are very early in the first trimester with our second little one. It’s a daily struggle to actually enjoy pregnancy and not be in fear of the “what if”. We know that God is good no matter what the outcome and that He is greater than any fear.
Congrats on your little one. Praying God’s peace upon you this morning.
Jeannette,
You have such a lovely name. Now I cannot imagine such pain you may have dealt with and felt durig that time. I do not have children of my own, although I have my nieces and nephews and knowing the love I have for them and the protection I feel at all times is tremendous. When I come across people like you that have heartbreaking experiances and are able to turn to God and feel him during those time of mourning proves to me the power our amazing King has. He heals us and provides each and everyone of us with what we need whether we know it or not. Whether we KNOW him or not. I grew up as a Muslim and found Jesus when I was graduating from high school. I remember being terrified because if you know anything about the Islamic religion you would know how “bad” that really is because in their eyes I am turning to the enemy. I was on my own and scared of what was to come keeping my new found religion and relationship with God as a secret (still am from my family). They say that God sometimes comforts you through the people he puts in your life. God sent me my best friend, Sarah five years ago. Sarah is eight years older than me and she grew up as a devout Jehovah Witness and left the religion about 1 year before meeting me. He sent her to me right when I was needing someone to understand where I was coming from. Someone to tell me that it is all going to be okay. Sarah left her past religion and lost her entire family (something I was and continue to fear). God took care of her. It was like God placed her in my life so I could have someone by my side but someone I could look to with similar experiences whose a few steps ahead of me In order to reassure me that it is all going to be okay. I never felt so much comfort and love. She continues to be my rock and the angel Jesus placed in my life at the right time. God is so intentional with everything he does. He is my comfort all the time.
I will be praying for you. <3
My dearest friends lost their perfect daughter Kate at 39 weeks last year. I have seem them walk through unspeakable grief and experience the same comfort you’ve described. I just wanted to encourage you how inspiring your witness is for those who look on and ache with you. Your faith in Christ and clinging to Him lifts high His name so beautifully. <3
When my father was sick last March and getting worse and worse and we had to make the decision to withdraw life support, the Lord’s presence was a constant comfort. God’s Word was profoundly comforting through all that time!
During an emotionally abusive relationship. After a particularly horrendous night, I remember being awake in my bed and just crying and worshipping at the same time. There is a profound experience of Jesus in pain that is unlike anything else!
Amen