Text: Titus 3:9-11
You know the people who yap endlessly about things that don’t really matter? They bicker back and forth about issues that do not have a lot of weight in the grand scheme of things. Do you ever find yourself participating? Titus makes sure we know how off-base those people are, and it’s probably wise that we check our hearts and motives in our desire to pursue controversy.
In my own life, I know that I often seek out controversy and dissent when I’m bored. When I feel like my own life isn’t interesting enough or there isn’t enough new information coming at me, I can seek out entertainment in latest article or most recent Christian issue going around Facebook. It’s entirely likely that I’ll immediately look for the rebuttal article as well, because what is an argument without two sides? There must be some biological “quick hit” that comes from engaging in this kind of back-and-forth, or even just following it from the sidelines like me.
I think sometimes arguing a point makes us feel we are doing important work, and maybe sometimes we are. But, the majority of the time when I’m apt to do so, it’s because my mind is idle and my hands aren’t busy actively loving and serving others. Are we making a big deal out of grey areas because we’d rather debate in the intellectual sphere than engage and serve in the physical one?
When I find over and over again that someone is contentious and loves the drama of an argument, I tend not to take them very seriously anymore. And, interestingly, that’s what Paul tells us to do. Go to them the first time, and then after that let it go and avoid them. Don’t waste your words on arguments that don’t ultimately matter.
Does this convict you like it does me? It pushes me to see how Scripture is working itself out in the lives of those in my community. It makes me long to use Truth to build others up rather than use my pride to tear them down.
I don’t want to have heady debates more than I have heart-to-hearts.
I don’t want to convince more than I pursue.
I don’t want to love my opinions more than my neighbor.
Lord, make us more like you. Amen.
Lord, let our mouths be pleasing in Your sight… what comes out of them is so much more important than what goes in. May both be wholly pleasing to You; may they glorify You in every way. Praise You, dear Jesus. Praise You. I love you, Oh Lord. Be blessed, dear friends.
Beware of the snare….quarreling is like a hot stove, don't touch it. By removing oneself from that encounter, we free ourselves from losing our foothold.
I think we should also remember that every word we speak would be judged……”I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak”….Matthew12:36 ESV
Amen… when reading that in bible study once I stopped and was so convicted, so humbled. Papa, make our words count before You. Forgive us for every petty, dirty, discouraging, sinful word. May our mouths bring you glory. Amen.
Praise The Lord ! This was perfect timing! I actually disengaged from a "debate" masquerading as "conversation" this very morning and was feeling a bit guilty about it! I guess it's ok to bow out and call a halt!
The Lord has knocked me over my head on keeping my mouth shut. I always have to correct someone or argue someone down to the ground but God chastised me everytime! If we really calculate how much time is wasted on silly and petty arguments we would be ashamed of it. Ladies, I pray that we strive to avoid the foolish things that Paul instructed Titus to steer clear of. There is so much work to be done in the Kingdom that we don't have any time to waste.
Amen! Lord, guard our hearts and minds in You! Praise Him! Blessings!
This is convicting for me when I think back on silly conversations with my husband where we go back and forth on a meaningless topic, neither one backing down because we both think we're "right". Ultimately the outcome doesn't matter, but we're both stubborn and hate to give in. It's not back to debate something, but I am reminded that it's OK to let him have the last word and it's not worth getting upset over!
Yes! I saw this quote once and it reminded me: "Sometimes it's better to be 'kind' than 'right'." Provided that the debate/discussion isn't trying to perverse or pollute God's word, yes. We should always come to discussions and debates with humility and love for one another, selflessness. Praying the Lord would bring you and your husband all the more close to Him, and that He'd move powerfully to keep you encouraging one another, not tearing each other down or wasting all of your words. Praise Him!
I can so relate to this! Just the other day this is exactly what we did with my husband. Started an argument and it turned into something so ugly just because neither of us wanted to back down and both of us wanted to come out winning. Obviously we both lag in humility area. After my husband noted what we are doing it hit me! I was willingly tearing down a solid relationship just for the pleasure of "beating him to the ground" in a silly argument. Is that love? I pray to the Lord to give me and you Andrea wisdom whenever such situation occurs again, to see through our pride and give us the strength to back down and be kind rather than right. Thank you Andrea for for your insight! Be blessed sister
God is calling me into a deeper more intimate relationship with Him. He asked back in March but I hesitated feeling unworthy. Then He asked again two days ago June 8.
I got what He said to me written down in my prayer journal. Here is what He said to me (copied and pasted it from my prayer journal. It’s an Iphone journal)
Fifteen years ago you gave me your heart. You turned from your sins and turned to Me. For 15 years beloved we’ve had a relationship. It was rocky at times and you were even stubborn at times. Even for a time you turned away. But I’ve already forgiven you beloved. I forgave you when you confessed and repented.
Let me sing over you, beloved. I take delight in my beautiful bride. Love is patient love is kind love always perseveres. It does boast. It is not rude. My love bears all things. My love forgives all things. My love is not selfish or self serving. For I am love itself beloved.
I propose to you right now, beloved. I propose a deeper more intimate relationship with you. Get into a deeper relationship with me beloved. Many waters cannot quench my love.”
I hesitated again feeling unworthy. Then He reassured me that His love is based on Who He is which is Love not on my actions. So I pushed aside the doubts and said Yes! Yes to a deeper more relationship with Him.
Pray for our relationship. That it will grow! Yay! ❤️
Praise the Lord!! I've been praying for You so much and this news is encouraging!! Be blessed, friend!! Praying that the Lord would guard your heart and that You'd continue to be passionate about seeking His glorious face and getting closer to Him! "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." (Proverbs 4:23), and "Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling, and to make you stand in the presence of His glory blameless with great joy, to the only God our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, dominion and authority, before all time and now and forever. Amen." –Jude 1:24-25. Praying for you, now! Love you!
Angela, Thank you for sharing your journal. God is so good! Blessings, Carrie
Does this mean we can not participate in any debates? Even friendly ones?
I don’t believe that is what Paul is saying. I believe that if God leads you to a debate then it is his will and he will use it for his glory. By led I mean stumble into, kicking and screaming. It is when we don’t want to speak up to defend and debate God and his word when I often feel the Holy Spirit saying, “Speak”. I think Paul is talking about when we enter debates for the wrong reasons. When we are nit following God’s lead but seeking our own glory.
Thank you for your wisdom and your words.
It definitely depends on the situation… discussion and honest conversations are beautiful, but could anything you say hurt the person, not pointing them to Christ? Could your emotions quickly turn to self instead of the Lord? Paul "reasoned" in the synagogues (Acts 17:2-3; 18:19) but I don't believe it was a heady debate; I think it more describes his presentation of the gospel in a logical, apologetic way (as https://bible.org/question/there-biblical-warrant… states– it has a lot of sound biblical support and reference on the topic).
Ultimately, I pray that the Lord would give you discernment and wisdom in this area, and that as you press into Him and ask that He'd be glorified, He'd give you the words– that none of them would be your own. He'll show you what you don't know! Praise Him for that.
"But in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect, having a good conscience, so that, when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame." –1 Peter 3:1-16.
Be blessed, friend. Praying for you now. Be encouraged.
Thank you so much, it is encouraging for me to know I am beening prayed for.
This passage is talking about false teachers and church disciple. Don't get into worthless conversation with them. You won't change them any more than they will change you. Although Paul is concerned about that and says to confront them. But if they don't see/hear the truth if the gospel have nothing more to do with them. Walk away.
That being said. I can get into a bibical debate in a New York minute! Sometimes I see a hit topic and can't let it go! Ugh!!! Like Haley, I must be bored. Unlike Haley, I'll participate. :(