The book of Proverbs is a guide for pursuing godly wisdom in our daily lives. In this four-week study, we will read a selection of topical proverbs covering different aspects of wisdom, from how to interact with our friends, families, and neighbors, to fearing God and keeping His commands. No matter the subject, these proverbs urge us to wrestle with and reflect on our own response to them. To help you better engage with the proverbs in this reading plan, we have provided you with a short introduction and reflection questions for each day.
In Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis wrote, “Pride leads to every other vice: it is the complete anti-God state of mind.” The wise person understands the battle between humility and pride is always raging in our hearts. These proverbs help us understand that fight.
Reflection Questions:
What is the difference between confidence and pride? Where in your life does pride have its strongest hold?
What is the difference between self-deprecation and humility? Why do you think we employ false humility in the ways we relate to others? What do we want it to do for us?
Scripture tells us that the Holy Spirit works in the lives of believers to make us more like Jesus (Philippians 2:13). This means He is working to cultivate humility in us. Spend time thanking God for a specific time in your life where He brought you to a place of true humility.
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45 thoughts on "Humility and Pride"
Sobering to consider the battle between pride and humility, brings to mind also that pride is a profound lie about who I am and humility is the crucial truth antidote.
Confidence- being certain of who you are and your abilities and understanding they are are God given.
Pride: Obsession with one’s self without acknowledging God.
I’ve never really thought myself as a prideful person, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t there. I’ve found that I tend to pride myself in being a “good girl” without realizing that I do in fact have my flaws and that there are some areas in who I am that may not be as good as I think. I definitely need God.
Self Depreciation: is putting one’s self down or being critical of yourself.
Humility is being humble and being modest. I think some of us employ false humility because we are putting ourselves down with he hopes that others will lift us up. It gives us a false sense of security.
Confidence is believing that I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. Pride is believing that I can do all things in my own strength.
I have a terrible stubborn side but I’m quick to recognize it. I have had several times where I have realized after the fact that my pride was in the way & God used hard situations to humble me. I’m so thankful He loves me that much to help me change my heart!
It took me awhile to figure out that I was using social media to get likes and compliments on my kids and accomplishments. I was addicted to the feedback. I stopped posting. I feel so much better. Pride was taking too much of me. I like the privacy and time with God that I now have more of.
I relate to you! Wanting to do everything “right” and worrying if I’m not doing something right or if I will still be happy with my choices many years from now, is exhausting! This was a lesson for me to humble myself before the Lord again and thank Him that He and His word are a light unto my path. That it’s not on my shoulders—I am His and I don’t have to do things perfectly, just keep my eyes on Him.
I have often struggled with pride and I think it ties hand in hand with my being on social media. I post pictures of my kids to boast about how beautiful or special they are and I post pictures of my craft projects to get compliments. I have reflected on this more and more recently and it makes me almost disgusted with myself. I don’t want to be that type of person. I pray that God instructs me and helps me to humble myself.
We must always be humble which is not weakness but be quick to forgive whether at fault or not. Problem why people leave the church want humble themselves before the Lord and return instead of letting their pride get in the way and you lose every time especially your relationship with God.
I remember learning in latin the meaning of humilis which translates to literally lowering yourself to the ground and the visual seemed very… negative but I think humility is about knowing one’s worth in Christ and not putting your skills and talents before your character and giving the glory back to God at all times.
Lord thank you for humbling me so i may be used as a vessel for thee!
Nhu, thank you so much for sharing your notes on false humility, I was stuck on that thought and your explanation perfect. Crystal
Amén
Beautiful.
Really appreciate your thoughts throughout this study but especially today’s definitions and distinctions. Thank you, Paula Kline.❤️❤️❤️
Confidence is knowing your abilities without showing arrogance. Pride is boasting about your abilities.
Not appreciating yourself or putting your self down. Humility is showing meekness even when yippy ate praised you give God the glory instead.
Thank you, Jennifer! I’ll be praying for you as well.
Pride most often tries to strangle my confidence through self-pity. Last night, the lion was seeking to devour my confidence in Christ by shaking me with lies about my identity. I was definitely feeling mistreated by someone very close to me and wallowing in the lie that “no one loves me.” Yet God brought me to these words as I sat at my desk and sought His comfort, tears running down my cheeks: “If you are feeling down about how someone has treated you recently, ask for God’s mercy on that person and on you. Let Him provide you with the encouragement you need right now” (The Beloved Psalms, 609). As I read, peace like a river filled my soul and I regained my confidence. There truly is “no mountain He won’t climb, coming after me.” Only He could have ministered that kind of comfort. Praying for my “enemy” is the last thing I wanted to do in my self-deprecation, but God humbled me by helping me to realize I was worshipping myself on my own high places of trouble, suffering, and responsibility (Hab. 3:19 AMP). In all of this, I realize that I employ false humility (self-deprecation and self-pity) when I fail to make a careful exploration of who I am and the work that I’ve been given by being impressed with myself or comparing myself with others. When I do this, I end up forfeiting the glorious responsibility I have to do my creative best with what God has given me (Galatians 6:4-5). Self-pity sucks time out of life, precious time, and has nothing to do with numbering our days wisely so that we might gain a heart of wisdom. There were a number of life-giving things I could have done instead of nurse my pride. Sometimes we have to learn the hard way the stark contrast between the ugliness of pride and the beauty of humility. Thank God for His grace.
I think pride comes when we rly on our own strengths. Confidence comes from knowing I’m God’s child and what He thinks matters most.
In my opinion, pride is self-centeredness, and at other times it is also self-reliant too when we try things in our strength, leaning on our own understanding, without resorting to the Lord’s counsel or His strength. On the other hand, confidence is a positive outlook we carry, I think more of an attitude that radiates from the goodness within. When you see a confident person, they are NOT necessarily prideful, but on the contrary they are enthusiastic, helpful and humble too (not low self esteemed).
False humility I see sometimes is a way to fish for compliments, pretending you don’t know something, and when it is your turn to come up, you nail it over the top, then everyone woo and wow. I think that is false pretense to draw attention to oneself, in the sense to maximize effect, it’s seeking vanity.
Praise God for willing us to conform to Jesus and His wonderful characters, while chipping away the things unfit. May God give us wisdom and eyes to see areas in our lives that pride is still dominant. Bless you sisters.
Jennifer, so true that Motherhood can be the ultimate lesson in humility!
I think of pride and self-deprecation as seeking praise and affirmation from others, something to boost our own egos. Confidence and humility are acting in the way of Christ because we know its right and we want to be Gods hands and feet; its focused on others, and seeks no recognition from anyone.
I would say pride is someone who cannot admit defeat. They have had wins and losses, but ignore the losses; and act self-righteously. Confidence, I would say, comes from learning from your defeat.
I think the Lord uses motherhood to build humility in me. There are so many things I have no control over as a mom and this reminds me that I never had control in the first place.
EC, I can definitely relate to you. I don’t really think of myself as prideful either, but I do try to do be the perfect mom, wife, daughter,friend, and Christian. It can be so exhausting. I am learning to rely on God’s strength and know that I can never be perfect this side of heaven.
Amanda, I am in the same boat that you are with looking for a job and needing wisdom and humility. I’ll be praying for you that God will give you the wisdom and humility that you need as well as patience while in the job searching process.
Self-deprecation is self-imposed. Humility happens organically. I know God worked through my Husband recently to humble me following a financial fail of mine – his response se what not his instinctive reaction, but one far more gracious and calm. That single moment shifted my adult heart.
(1) Pride is when we choose our will over God’s will. Confidence is trusting God’s will for our lives which is forgiveness of our sins through Christ Jesus and reconciliation to God the Father. Pride has it’s strongest hold on my life right now through the acceptance of God’s forgiveness. Also through finances, sleep, entertainment, and thinking more of myself than others.
(2) Self-deprecation is being critical of ones self. Humility is a sense of unworthiness and thinking more of others than we do ourselves. I think false humility is when we compare ourselves to others and are critical of ourselves for not being more like someone else we look up to or are envious of. I think we do it to help change ourselves into what we want to be. However, hate doesn’t drive out hate, only love can do that.
(3) Thanks be to God for helping me realize I don’t deserve his forgiveness or to be in his presence. Yet his grace covers me because He loves me whether I deserve it or not.
I’ve always been told that the pride is thinking too much of yourself, self depreciation and self consciousness is thinking of yourself too much, but humility is not stopping to think of ourselves much at all.
This is an area I have struggled with my whole life. I’ve harbored pride in certain aspects of my life while also feeling incredibly self deprecating and self conscious in the name of false humility. It’s only over the past few years that I’ve begun to understand that confidence in who God made me to be can exist right alongside with humility, especially because acknowledging that I am who HE says I am means that I cannot boast because none of that is my own accomplishment.
It’s interesting self reflecting on this topic because I don’t think of myself as prideful… but as I was thinking on this, I see I am prideful in that I try to do a lot of things in my own strength. As a working mom with toddlers, one of which has special needs I constantly strive to DO everything well And DO too much and I get burnt out because I’m relying on my own strength. I see this as pridefulness in that I’m not resting and relying on the Lord nearly enough as I should.
I use false humility and self-deprecation to lower the expectations of my life. With the bar lowered, I’m less likely to fail. If I think about stepping out of my comfort zone to pursue a big dream that God has placed on my heart, my mind takes over with endless “what if I don’t have what it takes? What if I get it wrong? What if I mess up?” The focus is all on me and not on Him.
This really struck a chord with me. Thanks for wording this so well that I could understand myself a bit better.
Ouch!! I have forever struggled with pride. God has given me some hard lessons, (being a school teacher can put you in your place often). Marriage issues, issues with our Son, etc. yet, I STILL struggle. Thank you for this lesson.
Humility = having a spirit of deference, a regard for others over self, not showing an attitude of superiority or contempt for people or things deemed inferior. Jesus help me!
The difference between confidence and pride is confidence is “others“ minded and trust in God alone. When you do something, you do with confidence knowing that you went to God for help. Pride is selfish and puts trust on oneself without asking) for help of others.
The thought about what do we want false humility to do for us…that hit me. It’s easy to seek approval or praise from others in this way, and even to deceive yourself in thinking you truly are humble. There is a fine balance between being truly humble and letting pride creep in through false humility. I also liked how they noted that the struggle is always something that is happening in the hearts of believers. Like the rest of our faith, it’s a daily thing, which is why it is so important to daily be intentional in prayer and being in the Word. In daily handing over the reins to the Holy Spirit. I have to be vigilant in keeping pride from creeping in and seeking out the areas of my life where it’s taken root already.
False humility seems a feeble attempt at raising self esteem and covering insecurity. It’s fleeting however.
True humility comes from realizing all that Christ has done for us and given us. Knowing all we are in Christ gives us confidence and a profound sense of gratitude. These are deep rooted and Rock solid.
The difference between false and true humility is the source. In false humility I am the source. In true humility He is the Source.
I was Thinking the same thing and had never really thought about that before!
The most poignant thought in here for me was ‘what do we expect false humility to do for us?’ Such a lie I even tell myself, and wasted effort!
Proverbs 8:13
The fear of the Lord is hatred of evil. Pride and arrogance and the way of evil and perverted speech I hate.
Proverbs 16:5
Everyone who is arrogant in heart is an abomination to the Lord; be assured, he will not go unpunished.
Proverbs 6:16-19
There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers.
Micah 6:8
He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?
As I move forward looking for a job I’m needing wisdom and humility. Wisdom to know that the job is right for me and my family. And humility because I am only whom God says I am. I don’t know what the days will bring, but the Lord does.
I am struggling with this now, while raising a granddaughter. She is 10, and due to her past experience, she has a lot of pride (and fight.) As I read this morning and looked up definitions I found the word hubris. Interesting because it means short-sighted. Irrational behaviors caused when a person doesn’t examine they actions or consider the effects on others as a result of their behavior. As a 10 year old that happens a lot but as Grammy, when (in frustration) you finally “one up” that 10 year old, that is pride or hubris. Immediately the verse “Examine your heart” comes to mind! Sometimes we allow ourselves (not others – it’s us) to be drawn into arguments or situations in “the heat of the moment”. Frustration cause us to loose our humility and forget our actions have a direct affect on others. Arguing means someone wants to win or be right (pride). But Jesus makes us think. Every story has a meaning. Every statement meant something in the effort to better someone. That’s the meaning of Proverbs; I am here to be better and better others. The Lord is so good! I learned something today! I am humbled. Truly.
ERB, you gave a great summary of the differences between confidence and pride and self-deprecation and humility. Pride and self-deprecation both put the emphasis on YOU, where confidence and humility put the emphasis on GOD. I need to spend some time reflecting on where pride has the strongest hold in my life because I’m honestly not sure (Lord, may your wisdom and truth be the loudest voice in my mind). I also need to reflect on a specific time where the Lord brought me to a place of true humility because again I can’t think of one off the top of my head.
Have a great weekend everyone!
Confidence = knowing who God is and walking in His ways and statutes.
Pride = anything “self”-centered/focused and ego-driven.
Where in my life does pride have its strongest hold? definitely my ego.
Self-deprecation = false sense of humility. It is “self” focused and it is not honoring God.
Humility = focused on God, honoring Him, and giving Him all the glory.
Why employ false humility while relating to others and why? because my eyes are focused on the wrong thing: pleasing and gaining other people’s approval. …my eyes should be fixed on pleasing and honoring God.
Pride is dangerous! The Bible says many things about pride. I have been very prideful. I remember being very prideful in the way I was speaking to my husband. Months later, I found out he was having an affair. Before I found out, he was very hostile with me. He said he was done and was over how I had treated him and all of the things I had done. I realized that he was right. I knew I was wrong and was ashamed of my ways. I let my pride in my identity take over. I was know to have a super clean house, be the fit girl that ate differently ( this is because of an eating disorder and then turned in to over exercising which some others didn’t know about), and being a hard worker. I had to do these things. I put these things first. I was angry, obsessive, and not easy to be around. Who would I be if I didn’t keep this up? I remember he said that I would be normal. I’m not saying that he should have had an affair. That wasn’t the answer. Please also know that eating disorders are can be deadly and please seek professional help if you are in the midsts of one. I hurt so many people and still am reaping some consequences. I am saying this, because you aren’t just hurting yourself, others pay a high price for our actions and non-actions. Also, I felt like I had power, but I was actually powerless to these obsessions and disorders. I don’t want anyone else to go through the pain. I hope this helps someone. Please get help, don’t try to impress others if it means not spending time with loved ones, or is for pride or the wrong reason.
Now, I don’t want to be proud. Any good thing that I have or do, is because God provided or allowed it. Please deliver me from pride, and please help me to think, act, and speak in ways that glorify You. Amen.
Ooh hé I’m firth to comment, that makes me feel like I’m on top of my game.
Or is that my pride speaking ;)
Have a nice and wonderful day full of God’s Power! Case you can do it!
-thes-
What is the difference between confidence and pride? Where in your life does pride have its strongest hold?
`I find that a hard one, I don’t know how to say it, but sometimes I lack confidence but are proud. Like, I stand by how I am, or what I think, just because I feel like it defines me or because I just do not want to give in, Even if I have no confidence. I know it is a childish habit, and I’m most of the time afterwards not proud of it. But if I am not stubborn or pigheaded What and who am I then? Something that I do have to say is that I am not a cocky person and that if I notice that my ways are hurting or annoying someone, I can put my pride away and boost my confidence by saying sorry.
What is the difference between self-deprecation and humility? Why do you think we employ false humility in the ways we relate to others? What do we want it to do for us?
`self-deprecation is a, it says it in the name, a self centred ‘thing?’. that is by some people just to get/reserve compliments, and others use it as their Point of view for the whole word. No matter how you use it, knowingly or unknowingly, it comes down to putting yourself in the middle of your thoughts and slowly your whole life, if that is now out of open pride to strike your self up, or out of scarinish to be proud and strike yourself down, it is a bad habit that sometimes society forces on us. For humility I read this; “Humility is often misinterpreted as merely lowering yourself below those around you despite your abilities; I think it’s much more than that. Humility is a balance of understanding what you’re good at as well as what you’re not so good at. You don’t let one outweigh the other.”. I think that says it beautifully.
Scripture tells us that the Holy Spirit works in the lives of believers to make us more like Jesus (Philippians 2:13). This means He is working to cultivate humility in us. Spend time thanking God for a specific time in your life where He brought you to a place of true humility.
`I don’t know when, I have just started on my path with God again and learning what he did and can do in my life. So I will thank you God for all the times You have been in my life at work without me knowing, and I want to thank you for all the times You will do it again. I want to pray if You want to help me be humble instead of being proud. Let me become a dwelling that You, God, can be proud of, for You Lord, are the highest most being, you have everything in Your hands. Have so ok me. Not because I’m worth it but in Jezus name. Amen.