cynthia young | blessing my disbelief

BY Diana Stone


“My friends, if anyone is detected in a transgression, you who have received the Spirit should restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness. Take care that you yourselves are not tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.  For if those who are nothing think they are something, they deceive themselves.” (Galatians 6:1-3)

Sometimes in Church when we listen to testimonies, we sit on the edge of our seats waiting for all the juicy details. I believe a lot of times we miss opportunities God gives us to help our brothers and sisters receive liberty from the many chains that bound us by focusing on the sin. Instead we should focus on the One who frees us from sin; testimonies are meant to bring glory and honor to God.

I have purposely not mentioned any ministries, name, or places; truly only a few know these details of my life. While writing I attempted to focus on God’s faithfulness and redemptive work in my life. We have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God!

I am 52 years old and my relationship with Christ has existed for over 30 years. So what I am about to say may shock some and even cause others to bring into question my Salvation. I am a minister of the Gospel and also I have traveled the world as a missionary. So when I tell you I love God and His Word; it is not just something I say, they are not empty words. 
I can truly understand the disbelief and questions some may have.

Two years ago I was right where some of you are today. Shaken and some of the same questions running through my mind; I questioned everything I believed. I thought I was on the right track; I was in full-time ministry, but Jesus was only Savior and not Lord of my life. There was also hurt in my life which I had not dealt with properly. Although the type of sin does not matter, to God sin is sin. I will reveal that it was sexual in nature and when I fell, I fell hard.

I can only remember continuing to hear God would get the glory out of this turmoil. My prayer has been through individual and group counseling, support groups, and not being able to active do ministry in my Church, “God you take this mess I have made and miraculously re-create something for righteousness-sake.
I thank God for His grace and mercy and His redemptive power.”

I thank Him for placing loving people in my life and professionals, who were willing to take the time to sit with me, listen (without judgment and/or condemnation). They prayed with me as well as for me while standing by me and holding my hand to the other side.

God’s grace has saved me, His mercy has been patient until I realized I needed to also allow Jesus to be Lord of my life, and His redemptive love has shown me incomparable forgiveness.


Post Comments (43)

43 thoughts on "cynthia young | blessing my disbelief"

  1. LA says:

    That was truly transformative and amazing. We are always looking for the big thing, the punch line, the it word then we miss the message by allowing the messenger’s word to be taken for granted.

  2. Cynthia says:

    Vickie, thank you for your kind words… and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.” (John 8:32 NASB)

    Charmaine, you are so right! I believe if we all are honest with ourselves and more so with our brothers and sisters in Christ, a lot more of us will be made free.

    Ellen MR, I was thinking of you and praying for you…thinking to myself that “it is unusual for her not to post”. Thank you; you have such a “Barnabas” spirit! I thank God often for the work He is doing in your life. As John wrote to Gaius I quote to you: Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers. (3 John 1:2 NASB)

  3. Ellen MR says:

    Dear Cynthia, I saw your testimony on my way to church yesterday, but didn’t get back to comment…
    Thank you Sister for bravely sharing your words, and your life with us. How fortunate we are to have your experience to draw on when we too fall. And this time, I will ask not only for forgiveness, but also for Jesus to be Lord of my life, now and forever, not just sometimes or when I think my salvation is threatened! As a “newbie” that’s my instinct. But with you and your wise words, today and whenever you post, I’ll grow so much more!
    My lady, I would never question your salvation!
    I’ve always considered you a Woman of God due to your extensive knowledge of Him and His word, and the sincere Love of the Lord that shines thru everything you say!
    Blessings to you! And I’m thankful you had wonderful support during your time of tribulation. Looking forward to Nehemiah with you!

  4. Charmaine says:

    Melissa I just want to say that I am praying for you and your husband. I know some of what it’s like to have such a battle your husband is dealing with” in the mind”. Satan can be strong in our minds but GOD is stronger! If I may suggest something… Read the Word to him everyday. Gods word is strong and powerful! It has helped me to stay focused! I’m glad there was some improvement and God is healing. Stay strong my sister and you AND your husband will be over comers.

    Cynthia thank you for sharing your testimony. You know it’s truly a blessing to hear that even those who teach the Word goes through. So times it seems that they are so perfect and nothing affects them. Almost like they have a barrier around them because they are teachers if Gods word. But I know they are as human as I am and have faults just like I do. So thank you bless you die being open and honest about your humanity. God is Lord!!!

  5. Cynthia says:

    Thanking everyone for their love and kindness!
    Sue :-), yes sin is sin but thank God for the Blood!
    Ingrid, thankful for Him being MY Kinsman Redeemer!
    Shan, so glad that Jesus is the Head of this Body we call the the Church!
    Thank you AmyKelly 213 for your encouragement!
    LaurenC_ , yes Savior is a blessing BUT Lord is a necessity!
    Ibukun thank you my Nigerian sister. I remember how excited I was finding you were from Africa!…mentioning you to my roommate who has a call of missions on her life to your part of the world. Be blessed and give God the glory.
    Brandi, thank you! My prayer daily is to do just that.
    Carolynmimi, you never cease to amaze me. You are a blessing!
    Christina, yes we should focus on the One who should be the center of our lives. Thank you for your prayers!
    Elizabeth, continue to seek and you will NEVER be disappointed!
    JuneBug, such a sweet, sweet spirit may God continue to shower blessings upon you. Thank God that He is continuing to mold and shape us all!
    Westcoastgal67, remember that He loves us more than we can ever imagine. Draw nigh to Him and He will draw nigh to you. Let Him love you!
    Melissa, the Word tells us that we will overcome by the words of our testimony. You, your husband, and family are in my prayers. God WILL get the glory!
    Tina, thank you and WELCOME! You have found a great place.
    LeahTvt, yes Lord of lords! Thank you.
    Candacejo, how wonderful you are! Continue to be a blessing to the Body of Christ.
    Madeline C., yes I believe we ALL struggle but the beauty of the struggle is the exchange of strength!
    Jesusgirl71, yes my sister…SO TRUE!
    Linda G…and Leenda324…LOL, I too thought I was seeing things oddly. Thankful to be able the encourage someone along the way!
    Sheila, so happy you commented today! Continue to allow God to use you; you have words that need to be read and heard.
    Adeline, thank you for your kindness!
    Cherry, you are welcome! That is what testimonies are meant to do…REMEMBER seasons are limited to the time God allows. They each have their purpose.

  6. Cherry says:

    Thank you for being so honest. You have given me strength to blueberry that I will get through this season of what seems like an endless mess. His grace is truly sufficient and His mercies are truly everlasting.

  7. Candacejo says:

    Melissa that is wonderful news! God answers prayer and will show up when we need Him! The Bible says to resist the devil and he will flee from you. You have a community of ladies around you praying for your situation, holding you up in prayer. “What time I am afraid I will trust in thee!”

  8. Adeline says:

    Thanks for sharing your testimony. It was really brave of you to do that.

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